As a new mom , there are so many things we do not know and we tend to incur so many mistakes and think it would be good if there was a manual we can follow and avoid all the suffering and pain.Inspite of all the information available on the web today, we still make mistakes again and again.so this blog is dedicated to all the new moms out there to avoid atleast some of the mistakes which I made and save some trouble for yourselves.I will be happy even if it helps one mom.
First mistake I made was that I travelled with my 4 month old baby from Sweden to India. My baby was born in a place where it is minus temperature and I took her to complete opposite temperature so that was a big adjustment for her .And it was peak summer in India that time. To top it I exclusively breastfed my baby for first 6 months of her life which meant not even water .so I fed my baby every half hour as It was so hot and sweaty in India that time. Also due to this I had sleepless night every night for almost entire first year of my baby’s life . With so many relatives coming to meet my baby , my days were quite busy which did not allow me to rest day time as well.
Second mistake is related to my first mistake as due to all this travelling back and forth I completely ignored my health. There was no proper timings for my food or sleep. I realised this grave mistake when my doctor in Sweden informed me that I have got auto immune disease which means my immune system is attacking my body instead of protecting it. I had the gut feeling that something Was wrong with me as I had severe joint pain and back pain. Every morning I was feeling sick and tired but still kept stretching thinking it is temporary and will go away. But after doctors diagnosis my doubts were confirmed that something is wrong and needs to be treated.
I was put on steroids and had to sleep for longer hours as the medicines used to make me feel sleepy. During that time I was so worried as my baby was 11 months old and there was nobody else to take care of my baby apart from me. So I had to take care of myself and her during this time. Thankfully I started feeling better with time. That time it hit me how badly I have behaved with myself by not eating healthy and also not eating on time. I was only worried about my child’s eating and sleeping schedule and had completely forgotten myself. I used to feed her first and also make sure that other members in family eat and then I ate .Also I am still breastfeeding so all the nutrients went to her leaving me nowhere. So my sincere request to all moms is to please take care of yourself because if you are healthy , only then you will be strong enough to take care of your children or else it will be a burden everyday. The first year of a child’s birth should be only about regaining moms health and creating a healthy life for your baby and about nobody else.
Third mistake was thinking that everything will be normal and settled and I will be able to resume or start my career once again when my baby turns one year old. To my surprise, nothing was going as I had planned in my head . Everyday was unpredictable and everyday provided us with a new challenge. I was stressed thinking that my career is over and now may be I will never be able to get back to work. I started feeling useless and unproductive as I was not earning and contributing to the household. All this took a toll on my health further and my confidence went down tremendously.
But thankfully the reveal of this disease came at the right time and opened my eyes to my mistakes.My doctor made me realise that delivering a child , taking care of child , breastfeeding a child is tough and a woman needs 2 years to recover from childbirth. That is when I started to see myself in a new light. I started forgiving and being gentle towards myself and started appreciating myself.
It is so often that we moms think wrong of ourselves. In spite of having so much strength , we weaken ourselves and belittle ourselves. It is not an easy job to keep your needs aside and take care of someone else with the same patience and love through the years. It is an on going job for which there is no education and also no salary .
Our salary is the numerous smiles and laughs our baby gives us , the numerous hugs and kisses they bestow upon us, their broken and incomplete words, the moments when they call out ‘mamma’
All these moments fill your heart with so much love and makes you forget all the pain. When I realised no job or career can give me this, I became a happy , content and a proud mom.
Just want to pass on the happiness and love to all the mums struggling or feeling low about themselves.
Remember we are raising the future scientists , presidents, actors, singers, astronauts, god knows who our little Munchkin will be !